I am a freelancer in the publishing industry, so words are very important to me. I'm a leftist living in a world gone mad, so politics are very important to me. I'm an environmentalist living in a degrading world, so pick up your damn trash, get rid of your gas guzzlers, and don't touch ANWR, you self-absorbed capitalists!

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21 November 2005

This One is Brought to You by the Letter Ahw

The Elder Imperatrix-in-Training (I will have to find a better moniker soon, but I haven’t the time [read ahead]. She wants it to be Xenith, but what the heck does that have to do with Imperatrixes, I’d like to know) is impatient for a new entry, so, I offer you the first in a series of thanks-giving entries.

Some background (although most of my readers [oh, alright, all of them, at this early blogging date] will know this): One of my sisters and her family are gracing the realm with their presence for the holiday this week (hence, not much time for anti-social activities like blogging), so we’ve got a Hobbit (“Is it time for elevenses? Or is it third-breakfasts?”) and a Princess around. And they have reminded me that I am very thankful that little children do not have a strong grasp of all letters of the alphabet, because the confounding of, in most cases, the “rrrr” sound with the “www” sound will always tickle me. Here is a string of examples, from the present day back into the mists of time, from a variety of nieces, nephews, and even the Imperatrixes-in, ahem,-Twaining:

“Do you know that stwanguhs can weaw wed pants or shorts?”

“Tante Impewatwix, do you see this dwahwing I dwew for the Wat?”

“Tante Impewatwix, my mommy says that I can go see the Impewatwixes -in-twaining at fencing tonight. It might be bohwing for me[the Hobbit’s eyebrows are wiggling up and down at this part, because he doesn’t believe it, but it will make his mother happy to hear him acknowledge this low-probability occurrence], but that’s okay.”

“We made wazzles for breakfast!”

As heard on a preschool playground: “Don’t you be mean to my big bludder!”

“Look at the squillows running in the tree!”

“For Halloween next year, I want to be a squarecoe!”

“Can we feed some nuts to the skee-roles?”

I’m looking forward to the future Missing-Letter Entries of the younger batch of nephews and nieces!