Note to Memoirists: DON'T LIE!

Did you all hear about this? Gang Memoir is Pure Fiction. I read the article last night. I had some outbursts of indignation as I read it, so I'll reproduce them here with you. (You can open the article and go along with me. It'll be like we're at the breakfast table together and I keep interrupting your reading with another snippet from my reading.)

In “Love and Consequences,” a critically acclaimed memoir published last week— Critically acclaimed? It's only been published one week! Let's wait a bit before labeling a book critically acclaimed, OK?

Riverhead Books, the unit of Penguin Group USA that published “Love and Consequences,” is recalling all copies of the book and has canceled Ms. Seltzer’s book tour, which was scheduled to start on Monday in Eugene, Ore., where she currently lives.—A book tour? Didn't the author ever consider the issue that her persona was a half-Native American woman, and she's 100% white?

The revelations of Ms. Seltzer’s mendacity came in the wake of the news last week that a Holocaust memoir, “Misha: A Mémoire of the Holocaust Years” by Misha Defonseca, was a fake, and perhaps more notoriously, two years ago James Frey, the author of a best-selling memoir, “A Million Little Pieces,” admitted that he had made up or exaggerated details in his account of his drug addiction and recovery.—Publishers' take home message: Don't publish memoirs any more. Or at least, do a little background checking, eh?

Ms. Seltzer’s story started unraveling last Thursday after she was profiled in the House & Home section of The New York Times. The article appeared alongside a photograph of Ms. Seltzer and her 8-year-old daughter, Rya. Ms. Seltzer’s older sister, Cyndi Hoffman, saw the article and called Riverhead to tell editors that Ms. Seltzer’s story was untrue.—Oooh. She must have done some pretty nasty stuff to her older sister when she was a kid. Three of Four, Split Sister, and Cowgirl: take note! (Although I wouldn't call the publisher, I would have called my sister and we would have had a little chat about the importance of literary honesty.)

[The editor in charge of the project said,] “It’s very upsetting to us because we spent so much time with this person and we felt such sympathy for her and she would talk about how she didn’t have any money or any heat and we completely bought into that and thought we were doing something good by bringing her story to light,” Ms. McGrath said.

“There’s a huge personal betrayal here as well as a professional one,” she said.—See comment above. Also: Maybe visit this person at least once during the three-year writing process, huh? (Three years!!)

Ms. Seltzer added that she wrote the book “sitting at the Starbucks” in South-Central, where “I would talk to kids who were Black Panthers and kids who were gang members and kids who were not.—Ummm, color me naive; and even, color me steeped with stereotypes, but, Starbucks? Really? That's where "the Back Panthers" (are they still active nowadays?) hang out? So, like, a Mr. T-style boss goes around saying, "Don't give me no jive talk. When I want a coffee, I want a five-dollar venti half-caf caramel macchiato, skinny, no whip, from Starbucks! Don't you go to the MickeyD's drive thru, boy! Get your ass over to the Starbucks!"

RANDOM SEGUE: I don't think I have mentioned these here before, but World of Warcraft recently created two commercials. One of them features Mr. T. I love Mr. T! This is a great commercial. Check it out if you haven't seen it yet. (The other one has William Shatner. Good, too. Just not as good as the Mr. T one.)

Environmentalists Can Put Together a Slick Video, Too

The Consort sent me this link today.

What Are They Waiting For?

Watch it. You'll laugh. And then you'll feel sick to your stomach.

Candidates, PAY ATTENTION!

Message to a Stranger

Photo from the New York Times

Lady, please, get the heck out of there! The fire is right at your doorstep. No house is worth your life.

250,000 urged to Evacuate Southern California

Pay Attention, Goddammit!

Arctic Melt Unnerves the Experts

[T]he floating ice dwindled to an extent unparalleled in a century or more, by several estimates...

Is this so abstract that people just don't care? A century or more. Wake up, world!

Oh wait -- I think people in power know about this. I think they've got reasons for not acting:

While open Arctic waters could be a boon for shipping, fishing and oil exploration, ...

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: sometimes I wish I believed in god, so I could damn people to hell.

But that's OK, they're damning us all to life in the New Hell: planet earth.

At least take a look at the multimedia graphic, Sea Ice in Retreat.

Last Night's Debate

So, did everybody watch the Democratic debate* last night?

Good for you. We didn’t.

Not for lack of trying. You see, we (being the weirdo non-TV watchers that we are), only ordered Basic Service (and pay 20 bucks a month for the privilege of knowing that, if we so chose, we could watch crap without fuzziness) – because that way we’d get good reception of the “traditional” stations, which should be enough to get what we might ever need: general news and live coverage of political events. Heck, with Basic Service, we get two CBSs, two ABCs, two NBCs, and two PBSs. Surely someone other than MSNBC would show debates, right? Wrong!!!! Even the PBS stations were showing some “War” show, which could be shown on any other night, right? (Shame on you, Vermont and New Hampshire Public Broadcasting. Shame, shame, shame.)

Of course, MSNBC was streaming the debates live online. Except that you needed Microsoft’s video software (rather than Apple’s QuickTime or the free [gasp!] RealPlayer). The Consort has it on his laptop, but his is an older machine and it would huff and puff and freeze up constantly. I never downloaded any of the MSCrap, because – well, because Microsoft sucks, and we all know it.

So we ended up listening to the debate on New Hampshire Public Radio. Impera had wanted to see the debates, so she sat in with us for a while, the Consort and I calling out the invisible speakers to her when they’d begin their answers: “That’s Edwards,” or “Obama’s speaking,” and so on.

But, can someone please tell me who the heck the older guy who bragged about sticking his credit card companies with $90,000 of debt when he declared bankruptcy was???

(I felt so bad for him. Call me crazy, but I don’t get the feeling he’s going to win the nomination.)

*Do you know that even though it was taking place at Bouche de Dard, they only gave out 30 (thirty!) tickets total to faculty.

Y, and Y??!!!!!

Toy-maker Fisher-Price is recalling 83 types of toys — including the popular Big Bird, Elmo, Dora and Diego characters — because their paint contains excessive amounts of lead.

The worldwide recall being announced Thursday involves 967,000 plastic preschool toys made by a Chinese vendor and sold in the United States between May and August...

1. Why, in this day and age, is anyone still using lead in their paint?

2. Why, in this day and age, is anyone still buying goods MADE IN CHINA?????

I've been making a concerted effort not to buy anything made in China. If everyone did, then market forces would be brought to bear on China's incredibly important export and manufacturing sector, and real changes would come about. (Really, I do it for the environmental and globalization effects, but, hey.)

(Sorry for the zippy posting, and nonexistant commenting. My sister, her spouse, the Hobbit, and the Princess are visiting, and we're busy doing off-line stuff. Later, dudes!)

The Stuff A Bureaucrat’s Dreams Are Made Of

1. The Consort’s co-author, who teaches at Bouche de Dard College (not its real name, you know what university is in Hanover), was able to get him an (unpaid) Visiting Researcher appointment. That way, he gets an office, has library privileges, and is eligible for a parking pass. When he went to get an ID for the gym, they said he “wasn’t on their list.” They called around, and checked some more, then said, “Oh, you’re a visiting researcher – VRs aren’t eligible to use the sports facilities.”

2. The rental agreement for the housing we were assigned begins on September 1. School for the girls begins on August 29. So for the first three days of the school year, we will drive them from the apartment we are staying in (another town, another district) to their school. Over that weekend, we’ll be moving in to our permanent housing for the rest of the 2007-2008 school year. I was told today that I have to send a copy of our rental agreement to the school district’s supervisor, so they can issue a waiver for the girls to attend their school (since we will be out of district when they begin school). Did I mention, this will be the case for THREE DAYS??

Look, I’m all for following the rules, but really, I think the risk inherent is giving a visiting researcher library privileges (where he can borrow and potentially lose hundred-dollar texts) is much higher than any risk of allowing him and his spouse to use the gym. Are they afraid of the cooties we’d leave on the equipment?

And really, do they think it would make more sense for the girls to attend the local school for three days, and then transfer into the town school district after the weekend? Really?

People always joke that midwesterners are staid, have no sense of humor, and are lacking in creativity. I beg to differ.

Why Is It? No. 37

Why is it that my facial moisturizer is SPF 15 and never gives me any problems, but when I put sunscreen on my face, even the teeniest tiniest amount that gets close to the corners of my eyes stings the bejeezus out of me for at least 30 minutes?

Ow!